I need you

Published October 14, 2013 by Sima

Emptiness in my heart is getting bigger and bigger and I ask why ? why did you leave me like this , u said that you’ll never do this to me but here am finding myself in another broken-heart story , I trusted u with everything , I gave you everything , I opened my heart to you , after my first I swore that I ‘ll never let anyone do the same to me again but here am finding myself thinking about u everyday , dreaming about u every night , I can’t just say that I miss you because what am feeling right now , is a hell lot bigger than just missing u , I need you ..that’s the word ,the word that summarizes everything ,I need your presence with me ,I need your hug , I need to hear that I love you one more time , u gave me life and then u just took it away .. Now what ! am I gonna suffer for eternity ! am I ever gonna find my man ! am I that really that bad to not deserve a better man , everyone I knew let me down , not one stayed with me and hold on to me .. maybe I should stop thinking about this , it seems like a lost case , why bother to give everything to someone who will leave you in the most hurtful way , and then just go on with their lives like you never existed , don’t I deserve someone to fight for me once ! am tired of fighting on my own L struggling to get over this and be strong in that , no one really gives a damn shit ,all that they say is that they understand what you are  going through but come on ,u couldn’t even imagine what am going through .. feels like the weight of the world on my shoulders and am everyone keeps pulling  u down even more ,so what should I do ? .. I just need you 

OverNight

Published October 7, 2013 by Sima

mixed feelings . last night was a chaotic night . I miss you and I don’t miss you . I love you and I don’t . how can I know what I want . Ever since you went away ,I feel cold , I thought I loved you with all my heart , I thought that I will never be able to forget you , I couldn’t even imagined life without you ..But what happened now baby ? I feel sad that I don’t feel a thing now and am happy that I don’t feel your burning love in my heart ..It did really happened overnight . However ,what will happen when I see your face and your smile ? I would really like to know the answer of that question .

Just another

Published May 20, 2013 by Sima

it is torture ! seeing you every night in my dreams and seeing you every where I go and what do I have ? nothing , am not even sure if I do have your heart . sometimes you make it sound so easy that I feel like am the luckiest girl on earth and sometimes you make me feel like you don’t give a damn shit . what am I suppose to believe , my heart ? my brain ? because both of them are struggling to believe you are the one and maybe am myself trying to convince them you are the one ! at the same time I want you out , out of my heart,my mind ,my life ..I waited too long but I can still wait thousand years ..but where does that gonna get me ! I just can’t stop thinking that after all this you will be just another man who’ll just find another girl and leave and eventually I will be just another girl with another broken heart . But what can I say am just another girl that loves a man from the bottom of her heart 

The question

Published May 17, 2013 by Sima

Sometimes I find myself in front of the mirror asking myself this “ why do I give everything in a relationship ? “ and I keep asking trying to find out if am being stupid and somehow romantic or simply real and honest . Where did that get me ? obviously being easily broken . I can’t deny that “I ‘ve been treated like dirt too many times “ but that didn’t stop me one second from trusting people , from giving them second chances and from trying always to see the good in them . I fight ,I struggle ,I be patient and I forgive and that’s sure as hell not easy to do ,but what can I say , commitment is my middle name .They say everyone learn from their mistakes but have you ever really met someone who hasn’t make the same mistake twice ? some people tend to be more careful , not get too attached the second time and avoid all the drama . Others will shut themselves emotionally saying that expecting anything from no one will guarantee you a happy life . seriously ? that’s what I call escape ,how does that makes life exciting ? Wait can truly be pointless , full of suffering and disappointments but it is also wait that keeps us alive , believing , waiting , hoping and full of life . It’s a magical chaos ,being numb will probably make your life easier but for sure won’t make it unforgettable . Every once and a while , you see such a status on facebook saying you should step up ,be strong , don’t wait or expect anything from someone who let you down and this and that ..well people we know that but that’s not real life . like it or not , there’s a part of us that is vulnerable , that waits ,wants and hopes . So personnaly I don’t believe in neither ways and with every new person ,I see a new challenge ,a new lesson to be learnt . I end up disappointed but stronger so the next hit wont hurt me as the last one did. So that’s not a reason to change myself because perhaps one day ,I ‘ll meet the person who appreciate the “ real me “ and not end up at the end of the day in front my mirror asking myself the same stupid silly questionImage